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10 Examples of Uninvolved Parenting and Why Neglect is Harmful

Uninvolved parenting is indifferent parenting in which parents are uninterested in their children’s lives. Uninvolved parents are neglectful and prioritize their own needs over their children.

This negligent parenting style is the worst among the four Baumrind parenting styles. At its extreme, uninvolved parenting is considered child abuse.

Neglected children are more likely to develop mental health issues, such as depression and drug abuse. Kids also have fewer social and emotional skills.

Uninvolved parents often have uninvolved parents in their childhood. In some cases, neglectful parents are indifferent due to mental health issues or addictions. Let’s explore why this parenting style is so harmful.

A woman plays on a screen while her bored daughter leans against her back.

What is uninvolved parenting?

Uninvolved parenting is a nondemanding and unresponsive parenting style. Uninvolved parents are indifferent to their children’s lives. Uninvolved parents are cold, distant, and uncaring. They rarely spend time with their children or connect with the children emotionally. These emotionally absent parents may only do the bare minimum to meet the children’s basic needs. 

Neglectful mothers or fathers do not discipline or monitor their children’s behavior. Children receive little guidance and are practically left to raise themselves.

The uninvolved parenting style is also called the neglectful parenting style. Neglectful parenting is considered the worst parenting style because children of uninvolved parents have the worst outcomes.

An uninvolved parent is sometimes said to have a cold father or cold mother syndrome.

Neglectful parenting examples

Here are some characteristics of uninvolved parenting.

  1. Limit time together – Not spending much time with their children or ignoring children’s attempts to interact.
  2. Ignore emotional needs – Failing to comfort children when they are in distress.
  3. Lack of interest in child’s education – Showing no interest in their children’s school work or skipping parent-teacher conferences.
  4. Overlook Health Issues – Ignoring signs of illness or delaying medical care for the child.
  5. Avoid responsibility – Not taking responsibility for children’s basic needs, like cooking or ensuring cleanliness. Expecting children to care for or raise themselves.
  6. Neglect discipline – Not setting rules or caring about problematic behavior.
  7. Fail to supervise – Leaving young children home alone without supervision.
  8. Disregard developmental milestones – Not caring about children’s developmental progress, like learning to walk or talk.
  9. Break promises – Frequently making promises to children but not keeping them.
  10. Withhold affection – Not expressing love, care, or interest in children’s lives

What are the effects of uninvolved parenting?

The consequences of neglectful parenting are dire. Uninvolved parenting can affect a child’s well-being and outcomes in development in the following ways.​1​

  • Show more relational aggression and violence​2​
  • Have more impulsive and less self-control​3​
  • Have lower academic performance​4,5​
  • Learn fewer life skills, such as social and emotional skills​6,7​
  • Have low self-esteem​8​
  • At risk of mental disorders, such as depression, border personality disorder, and substance abuse​9,10​ Children of substance-abused parents are 4-10 times more likely to develop substance abuse themselves.​11​
  • Neglected children will grow up 2.6 times more likely to become neglectful to their children and twice as likely to be physically abusive.​​12​
neglected child sits by himself while uninvolved parent sits in shadow

What causes cold mother syndrome (or cold father syndrome)?

Neglectful parents often come from dysfunctional families and have a lack of parental support themselves.

Negligent parenting can also result from mental health issues, personality disorders, or addiction problems. Researchers have found that 83% of addicted parents have been raised by addicted parents themselves. 55% of these parents have also suffered from child emotional neglect.​11​

Addicted parents with antisocial personality characteristics and choose mates predisposed to substance abuse or other mental health problems are at an even higher risk of becoming neglectful.

What are the four parenting styles?

The four parenting styles often used in psychological studies are authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, and uninvolved.

In the 1960s, Baumrind at the University of California at Berkeley identified three types of parenting styles, and then in 1983, Maccoby and Martin added a fourth type to the framework.​13​

These parenting styles are categorized based on responsiveness and demandingness.

What is the worst parenting style?

Uninvolved parenting is the worst parenting style because it often results in the worst outcomes in children. Children of neglectful parents are more likely to have the worst in child development, suffering emotionally and physically.

Is free-range parenting an uninvolved parenting style?

Free-range parenting is not an uninvolved parenting style. Free-range parenting is a term created in recent years to describe parents who give children the freedom to go to places such as the playground without adult supervision. 

Free-range only describes one aspect of parenting, which is whether the parent supervises their child when they’re outside of the house. This term doesn’t say whether the parent is warm and responsive to the children’s needs. 

A free-range parent can give their child much freedom in going out but is still warm and responsive. Free-range parents can also have high expectations of their child’s behavior, such as behaving and performing well in school.

Are busy parents uninvolved parents?

Busy parents may not be neglectful parents. Parents with highly demanding jobs inevitably have less free time for their kids, but these parents may still be warm and caring. 

Busy parents can still show interest in their children’s lives and create an emotional connection when spending time with their children.

When building a healthy parent-child relationship, quality is more important than quantity.

Neglectful parenting is a harmful parenting style. Uninvolved parents are uncaring parents with no interest in their children’s welfare. They are not just busy parents. Busy parents who lack involvement because they don’t care are uninvolved parents.

However, parents who lack time but care for their children and do not reject them are not uninvolved parents.

Reference

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    Kawabata Y, Alink LRA, Tseng WL, van IJzendoorn MH, Crick NR. Maternal and paternal parenting styles associated with relational aggression in children and adolescents: A conceptual analysis and meta-analytic review. Developmental Review. Published online December 2011:240-278. doi:10.1016/j.dr.2011.08.001
  3. 3.
    AUNOLA K, STATTIN H, NURMI JE. Parenting styles and adolescents’ achievement strategies. Journal of Adolescence. Published online April 2000:205-222. doi:10.1006/jado.2000.0308
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    BOON HJ. Low- and high-achieving Australian secondary school students: Their parenting, motivations and academic achievement. Australian Psychologist. Published online September 2007:212-225. doi:10.1080/00050060701405584
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    Pinquart M. Associations of Parenting Styles and Dimensions with Academic Achievement in Children and Adolescents: A Meta-analysis. Educ Psychol Rev. Published online September 7, 2015:475-493. doi:10.1007/s10648-015-9338-y
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    Berzenski SR. Distinct emotion regulation skills explain psychopathology and problems in social relationships following childhood emotional abuse and neglect. Dev Psychopathol. Published online March 22, 2018:483-496. doi:10.1017/s0954579418000020
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    Shipman K, Edwards A, Brown A, Swisher L, Jennings E. Managing emotion in a maltreating context: A pilot study examining child neglect. Child Abuse & Neglect. Published online September 2005:1015-1029. doi:10.1016/j.chiabu.2005.01.006
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    Darling N. Parenting Style and Its Correlates. ERIC Digest; 1999.
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    Bernet CZ, Stein MB. Relationship of childhood maltreatment to the onset and course of major depression in adulthood. Depress Anxiety. Published online 1999:169-174. doi:10.1002/(sici)1520-6394(1999)9:4<169::aid-da4>3.0.co;2-2
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    Taillieu TL, Brownridge DA, Sareen J, Afifi TO. Childhood emotional maltreatment and mental disorders: Results from a nationally representative adult sample from the United States. Child Abuse & Neglect. Published online September 2016:1-12. doi:10.1016/j.chiabu.2016.07.005
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    Dunn MG, Tarter RE, Mezzich AC, Vanyukov M, Kirillova G. Origins and consequences of child neglect in substance abuse families. Clinical Psychology Review. Published online 2002:1063 – 1090.
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    Kim J. Type-specific intergenerational transmission of neglectful and physically abusive parenting behaviors among young parents. Children and Youth Services Review. Published online July 2009:761-767. doi:10.1016/j.childyouth.2009.02.002
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    Huver RME, Otten R, de Vries H, Engels RCME. Personality and parenting style in parents of adolescents. Journal of Adolescence. Published online June 2010:395-402. doi:10.1016/j.adolescence.2009.07.012

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